DAVID Words are real. Feelings are real. It was a thought or, maybe, just a feeling which changed my whole life. One could be a prisoner of the idea. I think about death ever since I remember myself. I have my war, my wounds, my deaths. You never understood it. What is so real about such a life where love is blind. When your son's soul is invisible. I was sixteen too and I was wounded by you! you know it! I was wounded by my own country, my family! My pain is real! And I never recovered! (silence) So much for a dialogue...

DAVID'S VOICE David?

DAVID Is it you? (No answer.) Answer me! (Silence.) Oh, forget it!

DAVID'S VOICE David? David!

DAVID What?

DAVID'S VOICE Help me! Help!

DAVID Not again. Stop calling me! I can't help you, I can't! Nothing I can do about it. Understand? Nobody could help you...

DAVID'S VOICE Please, David. You promised...

DAVID Not now! I'm busy. I have to finish my thought...

DAVID'S VOICE I can't take it any longer, David. You know, I can't...

(Phone rings.)

DAVID (answers the phone) Yes... No, he is not home... I don't know... Yes, leave your message... No, he won't be able to call you back. He died... Today... Thank you. (Hangs up.) Hate birthday calls. Hate birthdays. Hate births. Is it a birth? This screaming, stupid something... what is my real birthday? The day when I began to think about my death.

DAVID'S VOICE Murderer!

DAVID Yeah, yeah. Talk to them. (Takes books from the shelf and throws.) Ask them! Why don't you talk to them? Oh, they are dead! I see. Too bad. Mr. Nietzsche, are you there, sir? Hello? Anybody home? (Listens.) Dead. He died yesterday. How sad. I would like to ask him too. How could it be that the world lives without him? How could the world live without me before I was born? I don't understand it! Do you, professor? (Listens.) They are never around when you need them. Come down for the birthday party! Or would you prefer the funeral?

MOTHER'S VOICE David? I have a present for you. Come here, let me kiss you...

DAVID Where?

MOTHER'S VOICE Here, I'm here.

DAVID I can't see you, ma.

MOTHER'S VOICE Of course, I am dead, David.

DAVID I know.

MOTHER'S VOICE Now you see?

DAVID No. What do you mean?

MOTHER'S VOICE You asked the question. I don't know the name of this man, something German, a professor, I guess. David?

DAVID Yes, mother?

MOTHER'S VOICE I'm dead and the world lives. It's good. You live.

DAVID'S VOICE Help me, mother! Help me!

MOTHER'S VOICE You are so tense, David. You always were a sensitive boy. I knew it will be difficult for you, but I wanted a real boy. I am so selfish...

DAVID'S VOICE Mother! Please! Please...

DAVID Don't you hear it, mother?

MOTHER'S VOICE I hear you, David. Of course, I hear you. I heard every sound. I would wake up in the middle of the night to look at you, and there was nothing -- you just turned in your little bed...

DAVID'S VOICE Mother! I am dying...

DAVID Mother! He is dying!

FATHER'S VOICE Mother! Where are you?

MOTHER'S VOICE Here, here. I'm talking to David...

DAVID'S VOICE David, they don't see me! They don't know me...

DAVID Leave me alone! All of you! Let me be alone! Do you hear me? (Listens, silence.)

(Mary enters.)

MARY David, please, put your suit on. For me. The guests will be here any minute. Please?

DAVID Yes, yes, I will.

MARY Thank you. (Kisses him.) I love you. (Leaves.)

(Pause.)

DAVID I'm here. It's just a fact. Yeah, facts. How could I know it, if I don't understand? Why should I pretend? I don't understand? Do you hear me? You, all of you! Friedreich? Look at them, they all, big and small accept it! How could you accept the unacceptable?

DAVID'S VOICE I'm listening.

DAVID Who are you?

DAVID'S VOICE You asked for me. I'm here.

DAVID Who?

DAVID'S VOICE Fred.

DAVID What?

DAVID'S VOICE Can't you see?

DAVID I don't!

DAVID'S VOICE Jesus! Frederick Nietzsche! All right?

DAVID (Pause.) That's your problem.
(Pause.)
I'm sorry. (Pause.) I said, I'm sorry! (Pause.) Answer me! (Pause.) Damn you! I hate you! Do you hear me? (Listens.) I don't care. Do you hear or net -- I hate you! (Turns on his recorder.) This thought is so big, it occupies my mind, it's there all the time. It take all the space. And I can think. I just stare. This death thought... (Silence.) I knew it. It's just a monologue.

DAVID'S VOICE The virtual is not opposed to the real, but only to the actual...

FATHER'S VOICE What did you say, son?

MOTHER'S VOICE Leave him alone, old man. You don't understand him, he is a professor...

FATHER'S VOICE He is my son! Don't tell me that I can't understand my own son! I'm his father! He is my blood and flesh! David?

DAVID Yes, father.

FATHER'S VOICE Are you all right?

(MARY enters with a tie.)

MARY I know, I know...

DAVID I hate this tie.

MARY It looks good on you. (Puts the tie on him, kisses him.) Smashing! (Leaves.)

MOTHER'S VOICE Beautiful.

DAVID Mother!

DAVID'S VOICE It's possible, David.

DAVID What is possible?

DAVID'S VOICE To live.

MOTHER'S VOICE Happy birthday, son. From both of us.

(David leaves.)

DAVID'S VOICE Mary! Mary!

MARY (Enters) David! They are here. David?

DAVID'S VOICE He left. He is not here, Mary.

MARY Where are you, David? Please, don't do it to me again. David! I am here for you...

MARY'S VOICE You can't help him. You know it.

DAVID'S VOICE Mary, we can't love anybody or anything...

MOTHER'S VOICE It's possible, David. Remember it. We love you...

MARY Please, come down, David. They are waiting. Please.

DAVID (Enters) I told you, I don't want it...

MARY What do you expect? They are children, your friends...

DAVID (takes the papers from his desk) I expect you to respect my will. I asked you not to do it. You promised. I said -- no funeral, no grave...

MARY I try...

DAVID Please, don't cry.

MARY I won't. It's difficult, David. So difficult... I know you didn't want to hurt us, but, you know, you should know, how could you not know...

DAVID And the flowers! What for? What does it mean -- the flowers?

MARY They brought it...

DAVID I thought you understood, I thought you understand. I explain everything. My reasons, everything. I wrote it down, I left the tape. And we talk before it...

MARY Yes. I didn't think it would happen...

DAVID What did you think? That I was joking? Just talking? I was dead serious! I did it. You should know me, you are my wife. I thought about it my whole life...

MARY I know. I saw it but I couldn't imagine it...

DAVID Where is the body?

MARY We didn't bring it. As you wanted.

DAVID Good. Thank you.

FATHER'S VOICE He is heartless, your son. So hard. Cold.

MOTHER'S VOICE No, he is not. He hides his feelings.

FATHER'S VOICE I was so happy when he was born, a boy... What did I know?

MOTHER'S VOICE He tried to be a good son. You tried to be a good father.

DAVID Mary, go to them. I'm not angry with you. I love you.

MARY I want you to be happy.

DAVID I'm happy. I am...

MARY Please, be happy.

(Exists.)

DAVID'S VOICE That was cruel.

DAVID It was cruel.

(FATHER enters.)

DAVID Father?

FATHER It was wrong, son. I don't understand all your reasons, but it's very wrong. You shouldn't...

DAVID Are you dead?

FATHER What? What is that?

DAVID How could you be here?

FATHER I don't agree with you. That's all. (Exits)

DAVID Wait!

DAVID'S VOICE I am thinking of killing him... I am forty eight and I ran out of options. I lost my hope. I'm tired...

DAVID Wait. That was me! I tape it. Where is the recorder? (Looking, searching and but unable to find it.) It was here...

DAVID'S VOICE ...I think about death since I remember myself. I have my war, my wounds, my deaths. You never understood it...

DAVID Mary! Mary, come here, please!

MOTHER (Enters) She can't come, David. She is not here.

DAVID Mother? Am I dead?

MOTHER Don't say it, David. Why do you insist on it? As if you want to die...

DAVID But you are dead. I know it...

MOTHER You always put it in such a harsh way. You are so harsh on yourself...

DAVID That's why you said that Mary is not here...

FATHER'S VOICE Mother? Where are you?

MOTHER I'm coming, coming... You worry too much, David. Please, don't worry yourself, promise me... All right, I won't say anything, I don't want you to get angry. (Exits)

DAVID Wait! Please!

DAVID'S VOICE Words are real. Feelings are real. It was a thought or, maybe, just a feeling which changed my whole life. One could be a prisoner of the idea. I think about death ever since I remember myself...

DAVID Stop it! I know everything you possibly can say!

DAVID'S VOICE This thought is so big, it occupies my mind, it's there all the time. It take all the space. And I can think. I just stare. This death thought...

DAVID This is my voice, my thoughts... Answer me!

DAVID'S VOICE Mr. Nietzsche, are you there, sir? Hello? Anybody home? (Listens.) Dead. He died yesterday. How sad. I would like to ask him too... ,p> DAVID You are dead. Nothing new I can expect from you...

DAVID'S VOICE I'm sorry.

DAVID Go away! Out!

DAVID'S VOICE I said, I'm sorry!

DAVID Shut up! Shut up!
(Pause)
Good. (Pause.) I'm lost. (Looking for a recorder.) Aha, it's here! (Turns it on, plays.) "I'm sorry that my action would cost the grief to his family. Especially, his children. Forgive me. You should know that I thought about it for many years. If they could understand their father's pain they would understand me. I decided that I would let the police tell them where to find the body. I don't want the family to deal with it. I record it for them without illusion that they would understand me. They can't. I want to inform." (Turns it off.) Mary! Mary!

MARY'S VOICE Yes? Come down, David, please.

(Mary enters.)

MARY Just stay for a while, that's all. I said that you are not feeling well.

DAVID (holds her) I'm sorry.

MARY Don't say it, David. You don't have to apologize to me.

DAVID Thank you.

MARY I don't know everything, David, but I feel for you. I love you. I know, you don't like this word, but I don't know how else to call it...

DAVID I come down with you. Come.

(They exit.)

MOTHER'S VOICE Today is his birthday...

FATHER'S VOICE Don't you think I know? I remember the day. The happiest day of my life. He doesn't know it. He doesn't understand the happiness.

(MOTHER enters.)

MOTHER Mary is a good wife.

FATHER Good woman.

MOTHER I wish we could know each other.

FATHER You do know each other. I know her. I know.

MOTHER Listen... They are singing...

FATHER I hear. Of course, they do. It's a birthday party.

END