-- Anatoly, don't think about yourself. Forget it. Think about me. Think about what you can understand. Think about that you can enjoy. Think about your life, not about yourself. Do you understand the difference?
It wasn't a voice, it was like in a dream, where nobody speaks, but you know what is said.
-- Anatoly, keep writing, my man. Keep writing and don't think about "after"? Keep thinking, keep living. Don't give up, please. Anatoly, do it, I want to hear your thoughts...
Yes, I understand it. I know that it better to think about little things... "Think big"? We can't thing about anything really big, only feel it.
Theory of Spectatorship aDiary + Film-North Album (new)
It's difficult to die.
SummaryInteresting that the Millenium of Woman (The Holy Ghost) coinsides with the time of Redemtion of Lucifer...
Notes"After Now" and "Now" have different meaning in eternity. Does it mean that eternity is a "moment"? What is "Next"? Another eternity? This is the only way to value both the eternity and the moment.
-- You see, you fear it... and this is a difference. You live. Tell me about it, about your horror, about the pain of the thought of dying...
After my long journey with Lucifer I thought of him as a child. Only a child could have no sense of death. Him, God, all of them, the immortals, Tolstoy and Dostoevsky, you name it, I feel as if I am the only adult around, because I was still alive. Some of them knew what I am going through. Yes, all of them, except for one, him, Lucifer. Maybe that was the punishment he recieved...
... The crowd of gods, all. Hard to beleive.
Why? The times of the Greeks. All have their places...
Shakespeare and Chekhov. They struggle, influence others. They are real and have their own personal natures and qualities, hierarchy. The Old and the New...
They were mortals and they know our passions and weaknesses.
They can possess you, there presence is everywhere in the second, our, human, universe. The demons of history, the rulers of nations and families (relatives).
The uknown gods, invisible, nameless.
They favor one hero other the other...
"Do you think it's possible?" He looked in my eyes. "You know what I think, Anatoly? Can I have it too? Like him."
I didn't know what to tell him. How would I know?
"I don't know," I said. "Somebody has to love you that much."
"Not with my reputation," Lucifer grimmed. "Not a real woman."
"What can I tell you," I asnwered. "Do you think it's different for me? It's all the same. She has to have it in her."
"At least they can see you...."
"Sometimes I wish that they wouldn't," I interrupted him. "She has to love me before she see me, before we met."
"Why don't you want to make movies anymore?"
"Films, not movies."
"Sorry, I remember it. Why not, Anatoly?"
"Because I don't want to make movies," I said. "And please, don't work on me. Thanks, but no thanks."
"Maybe you will change your mind," Lucifer came reallly close. "I want to show you something, I know will like it. I know you, you can make a great film, I will show you everything. Do you see it? Do you?"
Yes, I saw it.Bliss
[ pix: I see some images, scenes, but not the whole transition to "Teology of Technology"... ]
* 2008 -- ...
texts: ... semio
in focus: Tarkovsky, film as philosophy
reading: Film Art (textbook)
2005-2006 Theatre UAF Season: Four Farces + One Funeral & Godot'06
Film-North * Anatoly Antohin
© 2005 by vtheatre.net. Permission to link to this site is granted.